My daughter will be 6 in less than a month. She has been potty-trained since she was about 2 1/2 years old. She does not have accidents any more. Or so I thought. Last year she started Kindergarten and for 2 weeks or so at the beginning of the year she had "accidents" at school. The first we think really was an accident, but the rest of the incidents we think were just because she didn't want to stop what she was doing to go. We made it clear that it doesn't matter what she is doing, if she needs to potty then she should tell the teacher so she can go. And the "accidents" stopped. Until today. She is in her third week of 1st grade. She knows what to do. And yet she came home today in different clothes because of an "accident." When I asked her what happened, she said she couldn't help it. She does not have accidents at home. She does not have accidents in the car. She does not have accidents at church.

I know she does not have an infection. And experience shows that this is not a physiological issue. Aside from the school year starting, there haven't been any changes to her day-to-day life. This is simply a matter of her thinking that it isn't important to let her teacher know when she needs to go to the bathroom.

As for her excuse, she has begun trying to get away with lying to us when she does something she knows is wrong. My gut is telling me that she is lying this time, which is another matter.

How would you handle the bathroom part of this problem?

asked 30 Aug '11, 17:16

mkcoehoorn's gravatar image

accept rate: 8%

edited 30 Aug '11, 17:18

Does the teacher remind them to go at morning tea, lunch breaks etc? Maybe you need to remind your daughter she should try and go in the breaks. My son has just started school and in his class they are all sent to the toilet at the begining of the breaks. Occassionally he will not go all day (he can hold on for a long time) because he was busy finishing something at the start of break. We talked about how this is a good idea to go at break as then you wont need to go when you are doing something else.

My other thought is she nervous about going into the school bathrooms or is she unsure about where they are close to her class, or while she is in class. Maybe ask her why.


answered 30 Aug '11, 22:21

K%20D's gravatar image

accept rate: 13%

I think there is a toilet in her classroom. I know there was in her kindergarten class but I can't remember about her 1st grade room.

(31 Aug '11, 17:57) mkcoehoorn

Check and see if there is a toilet in her classroom, I'd bet there isn't. Almost all Kindergartens have their own, but I've never seen a first grade classroom with one (unless it used to be the kindergarten room). If her room doesn't have one, I'm with KD on this one, she probably doesn't like going to the "big kid bathroom" by herself.

(03 Sep '11, 12:34) Neen

Did the teacher shout at someone else for 'going to the toilet all the time'?

It's true that kids at that age aren't above lying, but they are also often very cagey about what actually happens during the school day...


answered 31 Aug '11, 15:49

Benjol's gravatar image

accept rate: 5%

I've talked with other parents who have had this teacher, as well as some of her co-workers and they have all said that she is wonderful with children. I don't think this is a situation where the teacher was too harsh with another child and mine misunderstood what was happening.

(31 Aug '11, 18:01) mkcoehoorn
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Asked: 30 Aug '11, 17:16

Seen: 1,907 times

Last updated: 03 Sep '11, 12:34