I just had my second child last week. I think I did a pretty good job of preparing my 3-year old son for his arrival. He accepted the baby into our home and LOVES to kiss and hug him and help with his care.

HOWEVER... I did not properly prepare myself for a change in behaviour in my happy-go-lucky, loving, obedient child. In reaction to the change in family dynamic my older son is now acting out, purposely breaking rules, and pushing his limits to the MAX where he used to listen the first time I say No... He is also EXTREMELY whiney and tantrum-y and his sleep patterns have suffered (hard time falling asleep, waking in the night, not napping)...

I know it`s normal for a child to act out in this situation, but HOW LONG WILL THIS LAST? What can I do to help the situation?

Note My husband and I have made an effort to give him special me and him time without the baby- he behaves well out of the house during these times... But the second we get home he`s back to acting out...

asked 08 Jul '12, 21:26

DazedandConfused's gravatar image

accept rate: 13%

edited 25 Sep '12, 11:21

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Tammy ♦♦


(16 Jul '12, 08:14) Tammy ♦♦

Get him involved when taking care of the baby. Have him help. Give him time with you and him in the house so he doesn't feel like the baby is ruling the house. He feels he needs to compete with the baby and you need to show him he doesn't


answered 15 Jul '12, 00:42

Sarina%20Renee%20Krack's gravatar image

Sarina Renee Krack
accept rate: 0%

Not to be pessimistic but we still experience the occasional jealousy issues and our youngest is now 19 months. It seems to come and go. Sometimes she will act like a baby to get attention she feels she is missing. In the last little while it helps that the two girls can interact more and as the oldest matures she is starting to understand her sister's limitations a little bit more.

Things that have helped is letting our oldest help out with the baby and talking to her about all the things she can do because she's big that her little sister can't do. We also try to give her special time.

From disscusions with other moms (friends, colleagues, co-workers) it seems that part of the attitude also just comes with being a three year old. I've been told it will pass just like any other phase, here's hoping.


answered 15 Jul '12, 12:23

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Tammy ♦♦
accept rate: 18%

It's a normal for kids to get jealous with their new born sibling. However, it in my experience it will be just an initial reaction because maybe, your first child was used to see that all your attention was with him only then suddenly it changed because he have sibling. I think the best thing to do is always involve your child in taking care of your baby. Don't give your first child a feeling of competition of your attention between him and your new baby.


answered 16 Jul '12, 22:55

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edited 17 Jul '12, 17:00

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Tammy ♦♦

@artistsn welcome to moms4mom.com. I've added a reference to you response to back up your statements about sibling jealousy. Please take a look at our back-it-up principle for the future http://moms4mom.com/back-it-up

(17 Jul '12, 16:59) Tammy ♦♦
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Asked: 08 Jul '12, 21:26

Seen: 3,330 times

Last updated: 25 Sep '12, 11:21