My 6 years daughter is developing a new behavior, she is demanding to do what ever she want, and if i did not allowed she start screaming, kicking and hit so hard on me or on her two brothers.she cry till she get her self down. if i tell her do home work before you watch the cartoon, but she want watch TV without doing home work . and if i did not allow that than she make my self so irritate by showing this manner.but i keep on my words she do on hers. is there any one who can help me to come out of this. or am i doing the right things on this matter keeping my words, but it is really hard to see that much cry on little one. some times she telling i want to die nobody loves me, do she want me to be emotional and than get what ever she want or is this words are serious ? Please some one give me good idea on this matter

asked 06 Nov '14, 13:35

mother03's gravatar image

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Our daughters have been through this phase as well. We first try to make sure that they are alright (not in pain, hungry, uncomfortable, have a problem we can solve). Otherwise, we clearly and calmly state our expectation (E.g. You must finish your homework before you can watch TV). If they have a tantrum (and sometimes these can look and sound ugly) we ignore them until they calm down. If they are having difficulty calming down we tell them to go into their rooms to try to calm down. If they need help we sit with them until they are calm, or let them have space. Once they are calm we explain again what the expectation is. We would never give into a tantrum. That would only teach them that their behavior is acceptable and will get them what they want. Eventually, with consistency the tantrums stop. Not that they don't have setbacks sometimes.

In our experience, kids say a lot of mean things when they are upset that they don't mean. Think about times when you have been upset and perhaps said things you didn't mean to say. Our daughter has called us mean, said she didn't like us etc... but she was angry and not in control of her emotions. If she is saying that she wants to die, or if our daughter said she hated us; once she calmed down, we would talk about how serious those words can be. We understand that she was angry or upset but it would better to say "I am angry" or "I'm mad at you", "I'm frustrated"... Our six your old has become very good at this.


answered 06 Nov '14, 18:56

DLCmommy's gravatar image

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Asked: 06 Nov '14, 13:35

Seen: 41,198 times

Last updated: 06 Nov '14, 18:56