We have been toilet training our three year old (slightly delayed due to relocating cities). We have pretty good success with doing wees in the toilet but virtually no success with doing number 2's (poo). He wears undies during the day and he will just doing poo in his undies. If he has an accident with wees he tells you straight away but if he does poo he doesn't tell you and will deny it if you ask.

He isn't regular with when he will do poos but we try putting him on toilet after dinner or at other times. He will sit for ages but not doing anything.

Does anyone have any tips on what we can do or do we just wait for him to get it?

asked 02 Feb '10, 04:53

K%20D's gravatar image

accept rate: 13%

Our first spent nearly 6 months where he would save his poo until he had a nappy on at night. He eventually started using the toilet. He'll get there eventually, regardless of what you do.

(03 Feb '10, 19:07) pipthegeek

Try telling him he can have a diaper/nappy for number 2s. See if then he will tell you when he needs to go or not.

It may be that he just doesn't feel them coming, but I suspect that there is something else involved - because why would he deny it once it's done?

Offering him the alternative will maybe help to diffuse the current 'poo-related stress', and enable you to find out if he can tell the difference.


answered 02 Feb '10, 06:24

Benjol's gravatar image

accept rate: 5%


Yeah, that's what I'd do too. I'd guess that he doesn't realize that he needs to go, and then doesn't tell you because he knows he's supposed to go in the potty and is disappointed in himself for getting his wonderfull big boy pants dirty and doesn't want to disappoint you, too. Poor mite.

(02 Feb '10, 09:39) Neen

In general I like Benjol's answer. But here are some other suggestions.

You can try rewarding him if he does poo in the potty. I.e. a special set of stickers for his sticker book.

If he just isn't caring whether he gets to the potty in time, you can try telling him he can wear big boy pants unless he has an accident. If he has an accident he has to wear a diaper for the rest of the day. Basically, if he acts like a big boy, he will be treated like a big boy, but if he acts like a baby, he will be treated like a baby. Preschoolers, in my experience, want to be seen and treated as if they were big kids, rather than babies.


answered 02 Feb '10, 16:00

mkcoehoorn's gravatar image

accept rate: 8%

Sometimes they dont like the sound of the plop, you could try putting tissue in the loo first, or a toilet trainer seat sometimes get rid of the fear of falling in the toilet.


answered 02 Feb '10, 14:18

Phil%20Seller's gravatar image

Phil Seller
accept rate: 9%

An update: After struggling with this for months in July he decided that if he did Number 2's in the toilet he could work towards getting a toy train. Two trains later and Number 2's are always in the toilet and he is dry overnight.

Both here and other places I discussed this with people I was often told he would get it at some point and I think that is what has happened. I don't think he really realised what was happening until a few months ago. So for us it was true that eventually they will get it and we had to be patient.


answered 30 Sep '10, 04:18

K%20D's gravatar image

accept rate: 13%

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Asked: 02 Feb '10, 04:53

Seen: 3,575 times

Last updated: 30 Sep '10, 04:18