My 6 month old is able to be put in his crib and fall asleep on his own for his naps and at nighttime, which is GREAT... However, he won't let anyone put him in his crib but ME! When other people try, including my husband, he cries as though he's insulted and sometimes goes into a fit (but he will go down quietly if I do it).

For wind-down, we listen to lullabyes and rock in the glider before he is put into his crib, and lately he won't even let my husband do THAT part of his sleepytime routine! Last night he cried in my husbands arms until I gave him my hand, which he held close to his face, and only then was able to close his eyes and relax.

How do I encourage my baby to accept other people putting him to sleep? How do I rid him of this dependence on me?

asked 03 Feb '10, 12:58

DazedandConfused's gravatar image

accept rate: 13%

I'm totally having the same problem right now! She won't even start her night time routine if daddy is in the room. So frustrating!

(12 Jul '12, 22:39) Rei Ayanami

I would suggest trying a gradual transition over several days where you and your husband put your baby to bed together. On the first night, you might do the whole routine with your husband just being present. Next night, he could do the first part of the routine with you present. (For us this would be getting undressed for a bath and then having a bath.) Then after a few days your husband could be doing the entire bedtime routine and you could start being absent for part of it and then eventually absent for all of it. We tried something similar for getting my husband to be able to put our little guy to sleep for naps and it only took a couple days, although I thought it would take a week or more.

As for his dependence on you, one of my friends recently said to me, "Enjoy this time, he won't be a baby for very long." :)


answered 03 Feb '10, 13:27

cat_g's gravatar image

accept rate: 25%


very true :) i found it very sweet when he held my hand to his face to fall asleep- it melted my heart.....but i was just worried for any future babysitters :)

(03 Feb '10, 14:10) DazedandConfused

If you're nursing, you might have to leave the house (the little darlings have noses like bloodhounds and can smell Mommy if she's within a mile, I swear!), and it is going to suck to be Daddy for a few days, 'cause baby is not going to like Mommy being gone at bedtime, but that was the only way I was able to get my oldest to let somebody else put him to bed.

My youngest will go to sleep for his Daddy, because they have a totally different ritual than we do when I put him to sleep. I wrap him up and nurse him to sleep and then put him in his crib. His Dad wraps him up and walks and dances and sings to him until he's asleep. (He's been a total failure at breast-feeding for some reason! Giggle!)

If you leave them be, no matter how hard it is, they'll probably work it out between the two of them. It's hard when they're crying (and you know that they just want you) to butt out, I know, but I'm sure your husband can handle it if you let him.

Of course, it's possible that exactly nothing you work out between the three of you will work with a babysitter, I've been for exactly one (aborted) romantic dinner since my daughter was born. But, I have been for a number of wonderfull romantic lunches. My teenagers will stay with their little sister and brother during the day, but after the last time, there is no way in the world they will stay with them anytime anywhere near bedtime. And they've polluted the babysitter pool, all of their friends have heard the story of "When the baby screamed for Mom for an hour straight," and they won't babysit either. Knowing an entire high-school of teenagers who could babysit for you, but won't, is a bloody greek tragedy.


answered 06 Feb '10, 08:12

Neen's gravatar image

accept rate: 30%

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Asked: 03 Feb '10, 12:58

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Last updated: 10 Aug '12, 06:46