I thought it was supposed to be the terrible two's but my son who is nearly three has suddenly changed from a light hearted easy going freindly boy into a highly strung angry little man and the slightest thing is setting him of into the wildest of tantrums to the point he screams so hard he has burst some blood vessels around his eyes. I have recently returned to work could this really be the cause?

asked 25 Mar '10, 17:07

Phil%20Seller's gravatar image

Phil Seller
accept rate: 9%

  • 1 Good question !
(25 Mar '10, 23:02) Emi

Just to update, the cause was a urine infection. I have my lovely little boy back.

(28 May '10, 06:36) Phil Seller

Does he have to be 'good' with his Grandma?

We often find that if our girls have been little angels with their carers, we catch the fallout when they come home.


answered 26 Mar '10, 07:27

Benjol's gravatar image

accept rate: 5%

+1 Great observation !

(26 Mar '10, 08:12) Emi

We are having the same issues with our son--he is so different lately. He has become very embarrassed about things and he is very negative. He can be so defiant, screaming at us, telling us no, and even hitting us at times. Time outs do not work, time outs in the corner do not work, taking his favorite toys away do not work...spanknings, going to his room...none of it work when there is a tantrum.

A lady at church told us to get a book called Reaising Your Spirited Child, by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. I started reading it and it has been very helpful so far. It puts a positive spin on how some kids feel emotions to extremes, but they are still normal. They have other little gifts, and tend to be very focused individuals, with unpredictable sleep or eating habits. I find our son is similar to this so we are using the book as another tool to help out.

One thing we have found super useful is to help our child identify his emotion (i.e. angry, sad, mad, etc.). Then we tell him about a time when we felt similar, and we also help him try to move on from it. It seems to help build a "logical reasoning" in his head, which helps him do it on his own. He has already begun showing signs of learning logical reasoning to keep his emotions more even. We just want to be careful not to break his spirit because he is a very passionate young boy and he is very creative.


answered 22 May '10, 22:47

Alysia's gravatar image

accept rate: 0%

Empathizing with you - I have a 5yo with similar issues and I'm off to look up the book you mentioned!

(02 Nov '10, 03:03) Emily

Wow! Poor little guy, and poor Mommy!

It very well could just be transitioning from being at home with you to getting used to you being at work,n my little guys really hate big changes to their routine. I obviously don't know what kind of child care you're using, but you might want to ask him if he likes it there, and ask his caregiver if they've noticed him having any problems. (I'm guessing that you've already done that, actually, but thought I'd mention it.)

If it goes on for longer than a couple of weeks, though, I'd take him in to his Doctor just to get him checked out. The only time one of my boys made a complete personality flip like that was my second oldest when he was on steroids when he was 3 to control his asthma.


answered 26 Mar '10, 00:36

Neen's gravatar image

accept rate: 30%

He goes to Grandma's and loves it there, its like home from home as we spend a great deal of time there.

(26 Mar '10, 06:46) Phil Seller

Hmmm, really weird then. I have known kids who reacted to food sensitivities that they had developed very suddenly that way (my sisters nephew suddenly turned into a wee monster, until they realized that he was allergic to wheat, put him on a gluten free diet and their charming little boy was back). It's something you can check?

(26 Mar '10, 06:56) Neen

Have you yourself asked him what's wrong and what's upsetting him ?

This answer is marked "community wiki".

answered 20 May '10, 01:59

Kristy's gravatar image

accept rate: 0%

edited 20 May '10, 11:13

Tammy's gravatar image

Tammy ♦♦


Not a bad suggestion. We often forget to try talking to the child themselves. I know he is only three but he may be able to tell you if something is bothering him/or something hurts in his own words

(20 May '10, 11:17) Tammy ♦♦
Your answer
toggle preview

Follow this question

By Email:

Once you sign in you will be able to subscribe for any updates here



Answers and Comments

Markdown Basics

  • *italic* or _italic_
  • **bold** or __bold__
  • link:[text](http://url.com/ "Title")
  • image?![alt text](/path/img.jpg "Title")
  • numbered list: 1. Foo 2. Bar
  • to add a line break simply add two spaces to where you would like the new line to be.
  • basic HTML tags are also supported



Asked: 25 Mar '10, 17:07

Seen: 3,370 times

Last updated: 22 May '10, 22:47